Cintrax, HexStoned-Gargoyle

[LightburneR]

Cintrax
HexStoned-Gargoyle

Agility; The Bane of Eternity

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"Ah... my love, let us kiss. Tonight is the night, shrieks are the in the air, the chorus of the Banites are sung! And tonight, we bathe in the blood of our enemies. We shall drink them, and in them, our child will be born. The Hallowed Order shall fall, nothing will stop us! Nothing will be in our way, for our child, I am willing to risk anything."

The Coffin remained silent.

"Why do you not speak my love? Is it not because I am cursed, in this wretched form? Is it? IS IT? Do you not share my passion? No, our love? Has it been gone, past me? No...... that cannot be true. You would love me forever... you said you would..."

A shriek cut the air.

"Trust me, my love. Our love shall be rekindled together with the birth of our child! And tonight will be that night. Tonight. The circle will be drawn, a child shall be born and we shall live amongst the ashes of the dead and the ruins of the justice that Order so proudly proclaims."

The Hand of the Council glowed... the time for war was closing.

"I must go my love, but do not worry, I will be back with our child. I shall bear the little one that makes you shed tears of joy!"

A gargoyle was seen in the air...... the coffin's lid was ajar.

Within, lay the corpse of a dead man.

=*=*=*=*=

Level 1 Skill (Active)
Sorrow

• Causes Cintrax to Bleed for X seconds. Cintrax is unbreakably invisible while Bleeding by this spell and Cintrax inflicts Bleed on damaged units for X seconds.

X increases with level, being 1-2s at lv1 and 5-6 seconds at lv5
Cooldown should be a constant, higher than X, but with the ultimate activated, it should only be about 1 or so second longer than X.

Level 1 Skill (Active)
Bloodrage

• Cintrax flies swiftly in a straight line, dealing X damage to the first enemy she encounters. If the target is Bleeding, this spell's cooldown is reset.

X should be a lowish value.
Cooldown should be moderate-low.
Range should be low.

Level 1 Skill (ActivePassive)
Bloodbath

• X seconds after using an ablilty other than this, this turns into an Active ablilty for Y seconds that can be activated to extend Bleed on nearby enemies for Z seconds and deal A damage to nearby enemies. If Cintrax is Bleeding, this ablilty deals x2 damage.

X should be a fixed value, perhaps at 2s or so.
Y should increase with level, starting at perhaps 1s then maxing out at 2s or so.
Z should be a constant. Moderate duration.
A should increase with level, at a lowish value. 50ish at lv1 and 200ish when maxed perhaps?

Level 6 Skill (Togglable Passive)
Rising with Love

• While this skill is activated, Cintrax is able to fly over the heads of her enemies and moves X faster. Her skills also have her cooldowns reduced by Y seconds. Drains Z mana per second whilst activated.

X increases with level, starting at about 50ish and increasing to 100ish.
Y should be a lowish value, perhaps 1 at lv1 and 2 at lv3.
Z should be moderate-expensive.

[TheDeathstalker]

Interesting hero, as are pretty much all heroes when innates are involved. While I personally don't quite like the idea of a flying hero (by the way, the first few times I read "can only reach a maximum of a units above the ground" I was really, really confused, try using capital A instead of lower-case a for variables, as a units sounds like horrible grammar, at the same time, I believe it would be more clear if it was "X height" or "X distance above the ground" instead of units... units are what you kill, not units of measurement, at least, that's not how it comes across), I think this hero takes an interesting attempt at it. The biggest problem I see is that there is no real synergy between any of the spells past the innate. I mean, yeah, you can use the skills together, but nothing greater is achieved. Let's take a look, shall we?

Say I start at 200 above the ground. I use Ominous Silence, and now I'm 300 above the ground, but muted. End of synergies (arguably no, but unless Z >> X, then yes). Now, say I use Stoned Swoop instead first, i deal 2z damage, and am at 100 height. Now I use Second Wingbeat X seconds later, which means for that X seconds I can't use Ominous Silence or I'll be muted and can't use my ult. Other than that, I could use Sonic Swiftness, dealing a bit more damage to the person I'm already next to, and then using Second Wingbeat, but that's kindof a waste of Sonic Swiftness. Now, our third and final option: starting with Sonic Swiftness. I fly in at minimum range (as my movespeed isn't boosted by any other skills) and hit a target, moving up to, say... 250 height. I now use Stoned Swoop and deal 2.5Z damage, then Second Wingbeat, then Ominous Silence to get away (or chase, but as you're muted, all you've got is your basic attack).

So, of your three skills, one has any meaningful way it can be used with any others, and even that's a bit contrived (like saying I use Attack-Move so that I'm close enough to use Attack, there's no beauty to it, it's just the way the game works).

Hell, I hate to even say it, but it seems to me that there's the same problem as last time, the skills seem a bit cherry picked, there's no real greater whole to this hero, no underlying character to it, it just goes up and down dealing damage in the process. Try and bring the creativity that exists in your intros into the character itself. Make the skills tell a story, make them work together and (again) form a whole greater than the sum of it's parts. Make it seem alive.

[LightburneR]

Note that this hero is not meant to be able to travese the terrain freely, meaning to say, while she can fly over units, but she is unable to move over... trees or water.

I re-phased it and used capital letters for variables, Stoned Swoop, Flight of Undeath and Second Wingbeat are totally unchanged.

Sonic Swiftness is changed slightly, where instead of relying on the speed for range, if she has over a certain amt. of speed, this spell will have no cooldown. (Mass Misses anyone?) Granted it is difficult to aim, this shouldn't be too much "Ouch..."

I scrapped the entire idea of Omnious Silence, (Self-Mute sucks, point taken) and changed it to Painful Existance (Wow it was painful spelling it) which resets all the cooldowns of her skills (Mass Spam!) and increases her height. It is likely that this skill will have no or a very small cooldown, yea but it extends Bleed on her.

Edit: Stoned Swoop was changed to "A Heavy Heart", Flight of Undeath to "Rising with Love", Second Wingbeat to "Love Hurts" (Perhaps Hurting Love would be more suitable?) and Sonic Swiftness to Bloodrage, my way of adding more character. (mostly because I feel more to her character whenever I read it =/)

[Co0kieL0rd]

hm, I think she's good enough to be taken for the next version as she is. Really, I wouldn't change anything concerning the effectiveness of her spells. Her sob-story and spell naming is a bit sloppy but why not try her...?

[SetaSoujirou]

hm, I think she's good enough to be taken for the next version as she is. Really, I wouldn't change anything concerning the effectiveness of her spells. Her sob-story and spell naming is a bit sloppy but why not try her...?

You're giving him way too much credit there. Note that this hero does absolutely NOTHING concerning using the condition system, and just randomly applies them willy-nilly. The 'height' system makes her seem too complicated for a DoE game. (Look at pubbies complaining about Sozen's MANA SHIELD) The third skill seems random, and out of place considering her other skills have "relatively low CD's" and especially when the skill itself has a CD of of a mere 2-3 seconds. The ultimate also seems random in the sense that it's just some AoE damage with blind attached, it is also pretty plain aside from the "After using an ability it turns into an active ability" which seems pretty meh.

[LightburneR]

She was what you could call a perfect girl, beautiful, smart, elegant, yet simple. Then she met her love (the corpse now) and they had a baby. Unfortunately, she fell sick during her pregnancy (drama =/) and had to either risk a dangerous delivery or abort the baby. Her husband decided that the latter was better for her and managed to abort her baby for her (I won't say how ) and she was so tramatised that she lost the sanity of her mind and eventually Hexed herself into a Gargoyle. In her bloodrage, she also killed her husband (and ironically burried and loved him), basically that is her past. (At least before that short paragraph) The naming scheme for the skills was also based on this backstory, which probably belongs somewhere else other than the Hero Suggestion Section.

Hm, I doubt that "Height" would really affect others. Only the specific player playing Cintrax would actually bother. At worst, I see people complaining of "instant-rape" from a Gargoyle dropping from the sky, but that would fall under balance issues.

I don't think conditions must be played around for every single hero. Sozen inflicts Bleed, but he doesn't do much with it. Vela drops Bleed, and Ruin, Ruin being essential whilst Bleed is just a secondary effect unless I am mistaken. And etc. etc.

Blind gives Cintrax an advantage. Considering she is a ranged hero (It would be odd to see a Gargoyle high in the air hitting the air and units below getting damaged) and her spells all require her to go close, point-blank range in fact, Blind is the only thing that will give her a strong chance of survival barring spells, but I think the fact is Casters die faster than Melees or Ranged.

The Ultimate requires Cintrax to be at close-range and in that respect, I believe that both her spells, with the exception of the third, brings her close enough to use it (anyway, it is meant to be used in combination) and raises her height and speed (Innate) which is essential to her two other skills.

And about that cooldown, the first skill can afford to be spammy, about 3-5 seconds, reason being you aren't just going to keep dropping it over and over again to deal minor insignificant damage and put you right smack in the middle of death. And in that sense, the third skill works with the first because of the height raise to boost damage and allow for an instant low-moderate damage.

Of course, it works much better with the Second, since the third skill basically lets you use the Second again and it itself is a spell. That allows it to hook up with the Innate, once again, to raise Height and Speed, allowing the first and second skills, respectively, to be more devastating. And with a 0 cooldown spell, you are basically gaining Height at an insane rate, which instantly sets you up for the First skill, not to mention is going to be crazy with the ultimate.

[TheDeathstalker]

She was what you could call a perfect girl, beautiful, smart, elegant, yet simple. Then she met her love (the corpse now) and they had a baby. Unfortunately, she fell sick during her pregnancy (drama =/) and had to either risk a dangerous delivery or abort the baby. Her husband decided that the latter was better for her and managed to abort her baby for her (I won't say how ) and she was so tramatised that she lost the sanity of her mind and eventually Hexed herself into a Gargoyle. In her bloodrage, she also killed her husband (and ironically burried and loved him), basically that is her past. (At least before that short paragraph) The naming scheme for the skills was also based on this backstory, which probably belongs somewhere else other than the Hero Suggestion Section.

The backstory actually belongs right along with the hero, so no fears there...

First (well, second) let me say good job. You're clearly trying to give some life to this hero, which is always a good thing. The only bit I might recommend is to keep the "timeframe" in mind. This isn't a game taking place in modern day, so just like you don't have any heroes struck deeply by global warming, you've also got a low level of abortions. I honestly would recommend avoiding such a topic as it's mostly unnecessary, and it would work just as well if she miscarried or had a stillbirth (and even then, you've got to be... careful, with these things). The idea of a loving woman filled with rage over loss isn't a bad idea though, but try not to befuddle it with potentially controversial things that really aren't a required part of the character. Anyways, it's good that you're showing effort, it means you are (for now) off my shitlist.

As to what Seta said about the innate. The big thing to remember with innates is that they have to impact every aspect of the hero, in such a way that the hero couldn't exist without them, otherwise they're just clutter. In it's current form, I don't think the innate quite meets that criteria. As it stands, you have several skills that make the hero fly higher, and only one that uses it. Yes, it also boosts the speed, but I personally find move speed to be more than enough of a boon, and having a skill do more with more movespeed is a terrifying concept. I think the fact that two skills use the innate more as a requirement for doing damage than a boon (or at least that's how it would have to be to be remotely balanced) makes it more a restraint than something to help. I speak from experience, as my first hero, AEGIS, used the same concept and got shot down for it.

The hero could easily be rebuilt without the innate and instead focusing on the conditions, interacting with them in an interesting way that somehow makes sense. While the flight aspect is fun, there has to be a more direct and simple way to do it than with the innate, or just not have it at all. The keys to a "flying" hero would be Maneuverability and Speed, as well as probably one other aspect like Spike Damage, Disabler, or Trickiness. If you build the skills around that (say 1-2 skills focused on keeping speed and movement up, and the others mixing them with the other aspect) all while keeping conditions in mind, you should be able to distill this hero into something more succinct without the need for the innate.

[LightburneR]

First (well, second) let me say good job. You're clearly trying to give some life to this hero, which is always a good thing. The only bit I might recommend is to keep the "timeframe" in mind. This isn't a game taking place in modern day, so just like you don't have any heroes struck deeply by global warming, you've also got a low level of abortions. I honestly would recommend avoiding such a topic as it's mostly unnecessary, and it would work just as well if she miscarried or had a stillbirth (and even then, you've got to be... careful, with these things). The idea of a loving woman filled with rage over loss isn't a bad idea though, but try not to befuddle it with potentially controversial things that really aren't a required part of the character. Anyways, it's good that you're showing effort, it means you are (for now) off my shitlist.

The abortion was done in a.... rather... painful, way which I rather not describe. (Started with an arguement, which then turned out into a somewhat accidental, not the way he intended but still happened, abortion)

I'll see what I can do with removing the Innate, and whatever I can do to drop the "This hero can fly" concept, because it would be confused with the general idea of "I fliez wheez".

Personally, I dis-like flying heros, especially ones that traverse the terrain. (I don't intend for Cintrax to hover over trees and snipe melee heros, no)

When I designed her skillset, she was somewhat focused on survivablilty due to the lack of targetablilty done through swift movements, namely her first and second skills, to dodge (when skillfully used) missile-based spells, Area of Effects, and single-target spells. (if you were quick enough)

I am highly considering changing her ultimate into a normal skill, and proceeding to change her ultimate as such:

Rising with Love (Toggable Passive)

• While this skill is activated, Cintrax is able to fly over the heads of her enemies and moves X faster. Her skills also have her cooldowns reduced by Y seconds. Drains Z mana whilst activated.

Note: Once again, she cannot fly over trees, mountains and rivers, for presonal preferance.

Or something on similar lines.

I was also considering removing the damage on the Ult (current, which will become a standard skill later) into a temporal fading.

Desperado (ActivePassive)

• X seconds after using an ablilty other than this, this turns into an Active ablilty for Y seconds that can be activated to extend Blind on nearby enemies for Z seconds and fades Cintrax for A seconds (or turns Cintrax unbreakably invisible for A seconds)

Fade refers to turning her transparent to a point where she can barely or cannot be seen. I prefer 80-95% fading, since it's just irritating for a hero to be just totally transparent, but semi-transparent (to the extent that one has to focus, should be good)

The other two skills would have to be re-worked accordingly later, but what do you guys think of these pair of changes to Cintrax?

Note: I will try to work a condition in to her, but...... it all depends on how much my creativity limits me.

[LightburneR]

I have removed the height system entirely, and gave her Bleed synergies, which would fit her best giving her background to pain and sorrow.

The Ultimate causes her to fly tho, but she won't be able to traverse the terrain.

[Intoxicated Crayon]

I think the height system is what gave it it's personality but...

The New Skills Blend Very Well in my Opinion anyways.

Nice Hero in Both Cases.