"It's all fun and games until someone loses an i" (Our calc class's T-shirt phrasing)

"Baby, let's add me, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and begin multiplying!"

"Theorem. A cat has nine tails.

Proof. No cat has eight tails. Since one cat has one more tail than no cat, it must have nine tails."

"Life is complex: it has both real and imaginary components."

"Will integrate for food"

"Q: What does George Bush complain about regarding math in schools?

A: That all the math departments offer an introduction to AlGore-ithms, and not GeorgeBush-ithms."

"Q: Do you know what the latest statistics joke is?

A: Probably..."

"In a dark, narrow alley, a function and a differential operator meet:

"Get out of my way - or I'll differentiate you till you're zero!"

"Try it - I'm

*e*^x..."

"Too bad... I'm d/dy"