That is just Warhammer in a different hat and you know it.
You've got decent mechanics, but (at least at quick glance) all your writing seems to be you trying to be dark and mature and not. Change up your subject matter or something and you'll benefit nicely.
[Edit: Lest I sound too much like an asshole...this is a problem literally half of teen authors have. As a teenager myself, I see it a lot, and can diagnose it from fifty paces. I'm not trying to be mean, I'm just trying to get you to STOP.
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